My newest addictions are Facebook and reading blogs. I am finding old friends, and I am discovering all that they have been doing in the past 10, 15, almost 20 years (yikes!). It is absolutely amazing to me what some of my friends have been up to.
Some of my friends are stay-at-home moms with 2, 3, 4, even 5 kids (whew! I do well with just one!). Several of these friends have blogs about their families, and I love reading their stories. Some are funny, others are thought-provoking, and some challenge me in my own quest to be a "good" mom. I am learning a lot from these friends and their stories!
One of my old church youth group friends is a pastor in Harlem (NYC!). How incredible is that! He says he and his wife love it there, and I can only imagine the adventures they have had. I wonder if I could leave the comforts of my home in Tennessee to travel to NYC and minister to people living in Harlem.......I wonder.
Another friend and his family are embarking on mission work in the Middle East. How scary! I am amazed by the faith and courage they have to go to an area of the world that is so dangerous for Americans. I pray that they stay safe and that God uses them in mighty ways. I know He will!
When I read about my friends' lives, I think about how mundane my life often is. Don't get me wrong. I love where I live, I love my family, I love my job. But honestly, my life doesn't have a lot of adventure. I am not out trying to find a lot of excitement, but when I discover what my friends' lives are like, I am reminded of how big the world is and how I could be doing so much more. I guess I need to open myself up more to the possibilities God has for me so I can see where that takes me!!
Thursday, July 31, 2008
Tuesday, July 22, 2008
Cherished Moments
One of the reasons I started this blog was to share stories about my daughter, Sydney Lynne. Now, I do not want this to be a "Sydney Blog," so don't worry. I will not always just talk about her. I do want to share some things about her from time to time that you might find interesting, though. I had two such occurences in the last 24 hours.
First, I bit of a funny story from yesterday afternoon..... this might be a "you had to be there" type of story, though. Sydney and I were in the car on the way to Publix to purchase a roast to cook for dinner (yes, I was going to buy the roast on Sunday, but you know what happened if you read my last blog post). When I have Sydney in the car with me, I try very hard to listen only to Christian music. I usually listen to Christian music when I am alone, too, but I really try to when she is with me. Yesterday was a day when I decided to listen to secular music instead, though.
For those of you who know me well, you know I love 80's music. Duran Duran is my all-time favorite group, but I like almost all 80's music, including some heavy metal (I know, strange coming from "little miss goody two shoes"). On the way to Publix yesterday I had the radio on a station that plays a lot of 80's music, and the song "Paradise City" by Guns 'n' Roses came on. If you know this song, you know it starts out kind of slow, "Take me down to the Paradise City where the grass is green, and the girls are pretty." After singing this phrase a couple of times, these guitars start goin' to town, and it's kind of heavy (not quite ACDC type heavy, but still a little heavy). Well, at this point in the song I looked at Sydney in the rear-view mirror, and what did I see??? My 16 month old daughter was head bangin' in the back seat!! I just about died laughing!! I said, "Peeps, are you back there head bangin'?" to which she laughed and continued to head bang even more! She and I did a little head bangin' to "Paradise City" until the song was over, and it was sooooo much fun! It's a good thing my mom was not with us, though. She would NOT have approved!!!
The other moment I want to share with you happened at 2 AM this morning. I was sleeping soundly when Sydney awoke and was crying. Apparently, she had lost her paci and could not find it. I try to keep extras in her bed for this very reason, but last night she could not find any of them, even with her nightlight on. After a couple of minutes (I wanted to wait and see if she found a paci before going into her room), I decided to go and help her out. When something like this happens in the middle of the night, Sydney usually wants me to get her out of bed to rock in her big pink rocking chair (sometimes she decides she wants to go downstairs and munch on some animal crackers or fruit loops before returning to bed, but she didn't do that last night). After rocking Syd for a while, I put her back in the bed, and she drifts back off to sleep.
Last night as I rocked Sydney in her big pink rocking chair, I cherished that time. While I was very sleepy and wanted to return to the comforts of my own bed, I knew how special this time together was. She is growing up sooooo fast, and sometimes I just want to stop the clock and hold her back. I know I can't do that, but it's during these precious moments during the night that I feel like I am stopping time just a bit. I know that before I can blink an eye Sydney will be off to kindergarten, then off to high school, college, and beyond, and someday she will have her own little angel to cuddle with in the middle of the night. So, instead of being irritated that my nice sleep has been interrupted when my daughter needs me in the middle of the night, I thank God for these moments because they mean more to me than I can ever explain.
I hope you have enjoyed these little tidbits of life with Sydney Lynne, and I hope God blesses you as much as He has blessed me. I may not be "rich" by worldly standards, but I am rich beyond measure in all ways that really matter.
P.S. An update on the car...... we are still waiting on it to be fixed completely, but we do know the battery was dead. So far with parts, labor, and the towing expense we are at about $400, but it will probably cost more than that by the time everything is said and done. I hope God provides a ram in the thicket for us!!!
First, I bit of a funny story from yesterday afternoon..... this might be a "you had to be there" type of story, though. Sydney and I were in the car on the way to Publix to purchase a roast to cook for dinner (yes, I was going to buy the roast on Sunday, but you know what happened if you read my last blog post). When I have Sydney in the car with me, I try very hard to listen only to Christian music. I usually listen to Christian music when I am alone, too, but I really try to when she is with me. Yesterday was a day when I decided to listen to secular music instead, though.
For those of you who know me well, you know I love 80's music. Duran Duran is my all-time favorite group, but I like almost all 80's music, including some heavy metal (I know, strange coming from "little miss goody two shoes"). On the way to Publix yesterday I had the radio on a station that plays a lot of 80's music, and the song "Paradise City" by Guns 'n' Roses came on. If you know this song, you know it starts out kind of slow, "Take me down to the Paradise City where the grass is green, and the girls are pretty." After singing this phrase a couple of times, these guitars start goin' to town, and it's kind of heavy (not quite ACDC type heavy, but still a little heavy). Well, at this point in the song I looked at Sydney in the rear-view mirror, and what did I see??? My 16 month old daughter was head bangin' in the back seat!! I just about died laughing!! I said, "Peeps, are you back there head bangin'?" to which she laughed and continued to head bang even more! She and I did a little head bangin' to "Paradise City" until the song was over, and it was sooooo much fun! It's a good thing my mom was not with us, though. She would NOT have approved!!!
The other moment I want to share with you happened at 2 AM this morning. I was sleeping soundly when Sydney awoke and was crying. Apparently, she had lost her paci and could not find it. I try to keep extras in her bed for this very reason, but last night she could not find any of them, even with her nightlight on. After a couple of minutes (I wanted to wait and see if she found a paci before going into her room), I decided to go and help her out. When something like this happens in the middle of the night, Sydney usually wants me to get her out of bed to rock in her big pink rocking chair (sometimes she decides she wants to go downstairs and munch on some animal crackers or fruit loops before returning to bed, but she didn't do that last night). After rocking Syd for a while, I put her back in the bed, and she drifts back off to sleep.
Last night as I rocked Sydney in her big pink rocking chair, I cherished that time. While I was very sleepy and wanted to return to the comforts of my own bed, I knew how special this time together was. She is growing up sooooo fast, and sometimes I just want to stop the clock and hold her back. I know I can't do that, but it's during these precious moments during the night that I feel like I am stopping time just a bit. I know that before I can blink an eye Sydney will be off to kindergarten, then off to high school, college, and beyond, and someday she will have her own little angel to cuddle with in the middle of the night. So, instead of being irritated that my nice sleep has been interrupted when my daughter needs me in the middle of the night, I thank God for these moments because they mean more to me than I can ever explain.
I hope you have enjoyed these little tidbits of life with Sydney Lynne, and I hope God blesses you as much as He has blessed me. I may not be "rich" by worldly standards, but I am rich beyond measure in all ways that really matter.
P.S. An update on the car...... we are still waiting on it to be fixed completely, but we do know the battery was dead. So far with parts, labor, and the towing expense we are at about $400, but it will probably cost more than that by the time everything is said and done. I hope God provides a ram in the thicket for us!!!
Sunday, July 20, 2008
God ALWAYS Provides!
Today started out as a great day. Sydney and I went to church at the Spring Hill campus of TPC (Todd had to work), and the sermon was great. William Guice spoke, and I always like hearing him speak. William spoke about Abraham and Isaac and about trusting God (there was more to the sermon than that, but that's my Cliffs Notes version). He talked about how God will test us to see if we REALLY believe He will provide for us. Abraham was willing to offer his only son, Isaac, as a living sacrifice to God because God told him to, BUT in doing so he also BELIEVED that God would allow Isaac to live (or at least be raised from the dead after Abraham sacrificed him). Just as Abraham was about to kill his only son as a sacrifice to God, God stepped in and provided a ram in the thicket to take the place of Isaac as the sacrifice. What amazing faith Abraham had!! God will often test our faith as well to see if we will trust that He will provide a ram in the thicket for us. In listening to William, little did I know that my faith in God's provision would be tested shortly afterward.
My day continued to go smoothly after church as Sydney and I were on our way to Publix to get a roast to fix for dinner (I was actually going to cook for a change!). On the way, as we drove through "downtown Spring Hill" (all 3 traffic lights), I saw some signs for a farmer's market that was taking place. At the farmer's market they were having a petting zoo, and I knew I had to find that petting zoo for little Miss Sydney!! I found it on a side street in town, and Syd and I got out of the car and visited with some goats, a baby calf (sooooooo sweet BTW that I wanted to take him home for a pet!!), a huge pig (and I mean HUGE!!), ducks, hens, bunnies, and a llama. It was so much fun! Sydney didn't quite know what to think about the animals because they were very different from our dogs and cats at home, but she didn't cry any (she is so brave!). I, being the animal lover that I am, was in hog heaven with the animals at the petting zoo (no pun intended toward the HUGE pig!). It was sooooo much fun!! After leaving the petting zoo, we headed toward Publix. That's when I got a call from Todd........
It appears that Todd's car decided to break down today. His car is not old ('06 Altima), so this came as a bit of a shock to me. Apparently, Todd had been running a few errands before going to work, and when he came out of one of the stores and got in his car, it would not start. Dead. Nothing. He got a friend to come and try to jump it off, and that did not help. So, it was obviously not the battery. Soooooo, Todd had to call Nissan and had to get a tow truck to come and take the car to the dealership. All this happened in Murfreesboro, about 35-40 minutes away from Spring Hill. So, I had to go pick up Todd and take him to work. Then, I called my parents and asked if they would mind bringing one of their vehicles to M'boro so Todd could drive it for a day or two (hopefully not longer!). Mom and Dad have 3 vehicles, so luckily they always have a "spare" for times such as these. They gladly said they would come down (afterall, they would get to see Miss Sydney!), so they did, and Todd now has a car to drive until the Altima gets fixed.
Needless to say, the newest saga for us with the car breaking down reminded me of William's sermon and how God ALWAYS PROVIDES for us. If you read my last blog, I griped quite a bit about several monetary hassles Todd and I have had this past month (I forgot to mention our computer breaking too and us having to spend $600 on a new one- Todd's parents graciously paid for that, though!). This past month has been one where over and over and over we have had to shell out extra money on things when we don't really have extra money to shell out. HOWEVER, through it all God HAS PROVIDED for our needs. Our bills are all paid, we have a roof over our heads and food in our tummies, gas in our tanks (that's a big one these days!), and our beautiful daughter. All in all, we have EVERYTHING that we NEED. It might not be all that we WANT, but it's everything that we NEED. God is ALWAYS FAITHFUL, and I know this car trouble is just His way of testing us again to see if we REALLY BELIEVE that He will provide for us.
As we wait to hear what is wrong with our car, I am confident that God will provide a ram in the thicket for us. Luckily, Todd has an extended warranty on his car, so hopefully that will cover the cost of our repairs. For me, as long as I have my family, friends, food, and a home, I am a happy woman.
My day continued to go smoothly after church as Sydney and I were on our way to Publix to get a roast to fix for dinner (I was actually going to cook for a change!). On the way, as we drove through "downtown Spring Hill" (all 3 traffic lights), I saw some signs for a farmer's market that was taking place. At the farmer's market they were having a petting zoo, and I knew I had to find that petting zoo for little Miss Sydney!! I found it on a side street in town, and Syd and I got out of the car and visited with some goats, a baby calf (sooooooo sweet BTW that I wanted to take him home for a pet!!), a huge pig (and I mean HUGE!!), ducks, hens, bunnies, and a llama. It was so much fun! Sydney didn't quite know what to think about the animals because they were very different from our dogs and cats at home, but she didn't cry any (she is so brave!). I, being the animal lover that I am, was in hog heaven with the animals at the petting zoo (no pun intended toward the HUGE pig!). It was sooooo much fun!! After leaving the petting zoo, we headed toward Publix. That's when I got a call from Todd........
It appears that Todd's car decided to break down today. His car is not old ('06 Altima), so this came as a bit of a shock to me. Apparently, Todd had been running a few errands before going to work, and when he came out of one of the stores and got in his car, it would not start. Dead. Nothing. He got a friend to come and try to jump it off, and that did not help. So, it was obviously not the battery. Soooooo, Todd had to call Nissan and had to get a tow truck to come and take the car to the dealership. All this happened in Murfreesboro, about 35-40 minutes away from Spring Hill. So, I had to go pick up Todd and take him to work. Then, I called my parents and asked if they would mind bringing one of their vehicles to M'boro so Todd could drive it for a day or two (hopefully not longer!). Mom and Dad have 3 vehicles, so luckily they always have a "spare" for times such as these. They gladly said they would come down (afterall, they would get to see Miss Sydney!), so they did, and Todd now has a car to drive until the Altima gets fixed.
Needless to say, the newest saga for us with the car breaking down reminded me of William's sermon and how God ALWAYS PROVIDES for us. If you read my last blog, I griped quite a bit about several monetary hassles Todd and I have had this past month (I forgot to mention our computer breaking too and us having to spend $600 on a new one- Todd's parents graciously paid for that, though!). This past month has been one where over and over and over we have had to shell out extra money on things when we don't really have extra money to shell out. HOWEVER, through it all God HAS PROVIDED for our needs. Our bills are all paid, we have a roof over our heads and food in our tummies, gas in our tanks (that's a big one these days!), and our beautiful daughter. All in all, we have EVERYTHING that we NEED. It might not be all that we WANT, but it's everything that we NEED. God is ALWAYS FAITHFUL, and I know this car trouble is just His way of testing us again to see if we REALLY BELIEVE that He will provide for us.
As we wait to hear what is wrong with our car, I am confident that God will provide a ram in the thicket for us. Luckily, Todd has an extended warranty on his car, so hopefully that will cover the cost of our repairs. For me, as long as I have my family, friends, food, and a home, I am a happy woman.
Thursday, July 17, 2008
Tired of Getting Ripped Off......
Today I must gripe a bit (well, maybe a lot). We recently got our phone bill, and for the fun of it AT&T decided to bill us for our cell coverage TWICE this month. We have our home phone, internet, and cell phones "bundled together" with AT&T, and our total bill this month is $415 (it's usually about $230). We discovered that we had accidentally been double charged (or so we thought) for our cell coverage, so Todd called AT&T today to inquire about it. After spending over an hour on the phone with them and speaking with several people, he was told something screwy about our billing cycles not being "in sync," and AT&T needing to charge us an extra payment to make up for this. Whatever that means! In my opinion, it's AT&T's mixup, and THEY should have to foot that bill, not us!! Todd threatened to cancel our service (we have both been with Bellsouth/AT&T for at least 15 years), and their attitude was like, "Well, whatever you want to do. We don't care." So, at this point we don't have a choice about paying the extra money. And believe me, if Todd Ryan can't get AT&T to help us out, no one can! He can be a little ruthless with this kind of crap (that's why I had him call AT&T instead of me!!). That's one gripe.
While I am griping about having to pay "extra" bills, I must gripe about our health insurance company, too. When I left my full-time job when Sydney was born, Todd and I had to get health insurance on our own. Todd is considered to be self-employed since he is a real estate agent, so insurance with his company is not an option. So, we got insurance on our own to the tune of about $480/month (with a $5,000 deductible, too!). Well, of course we never go to the doctor enough to reach our deductible, so all medical care that we have had has come out of our pocket (along with paying $480 every month!).
If you have ever had a baby, you know how many wellness visits they have during their first two years of life. Since we have never met our deductible, we have had to pay for all of Sydney's wellness visits out-of-pocket, each costing $300-$400 (and still paying that blasted $480 every month!). As much of a pain that has been, we knew that's what would happen since our insurance didn't cover child wellness visits (isn't it funny that insurance companies will choose to not pay for something that they KNOW your child will need!!!!).
Well, the kicker was this month's medical bills. I had a doctor's appointment in May and had some routine blood tests run (cholesterol, blood sugar, hormones, etc.- nothing unusual). During this past month I have received about $400 worth of bills from the various tests that were run (things our insurance company didn't cover- imagine that!). Todd also had to go to the doctor for a minor foot injury, and that cost $100. Then, we got the bill for Sydney's 15 month wellness visit, and that was $200. All in all, we had to pay about $700 in medical bills this month (all while STILL paying that $480)! Oh, but it gets even BETTER!!!
About a month ago we got a statement from our insurance company telling us that "due to the rising cost of medical care" our monthly premium was going up to $605/month instead of $480. UGH!!! What the crap?!?!? Just like the phone company, the insurance company can basically do whatever it wants because they know they have us by the b***s.
So, this month we have had to pay $700 in extra medical bills, $125 more in health insurance, and we will have to pay an extra $185 on our phone bill in a couple of weeks. Oh, and did you catch the part about Todd being in REAL ESTATE?!?!?! We all know how that market is right now!! We are holding our own with the commissions he is getting and with me working part-time, but we certainly don't have a plethora of extra cash laying around. It just gripes me that companies can do whatever they want, and the consumers are just supposed to take it. Whatever happened to good customer service and treating people like human beings?????? Call me old fashioned, but I believe in living life by the Golden Rule: "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you." I guess our world has gotten too big for the Golden Rule. I think God would disagree, though.........
While I am griping about having to pay "extra" bills, I must gripe about our health insurance company, too. When I left my full-time job when Sydney was born, Todd and I had to get health insurance on our own. Todd is considered to be self-employed since he is a real estate agent, so insurance with his company is not an option. So, we got insurance on our own to the tune of about $480/month (with a $5,000 deductible, too!). Well, of course we never go to the doctor enough to reach our deductible, so all medical care that we have had has come out of our pocket (along with paying $480 every month!).
If you have ever had a baby, you know how many wellness visits they have during their first two years of life. Since we have never met our deductible, we have had to pay for all of Sydney's wellness visits out-of-pocket, each costing $300-$400 (and still paying that blasted $480 every month!). As much of a pain that has been, we knew that's what would happen since our insurance didn't cover child wellness visits (isn't it funny that insurance companies will choose to not pay for something that they KNOW your child will need!!!!).
Well, the kicker was this month's medical bills. I had a doctor's appointment in May and had some routine blood tests run (cholesterol, blood sugar, hormones, etc.- nothing unusual). During this past month I have received about $400 worth of bills from the various tests that were run (things our insurance company didn't cover- imagine that!). Todd also had to go to the doctor for a minor foot injury, and that cost $100. Then, we got the bill for Sydney's 15 month wellness visit, and that was $200. All in all, we had to pay about $700 in medical bills this month (all while STILL paying that $480)! Oh, but it gets even BETTER!!!
About a month ago we got a statement from our insurance company telling us that "due to the rising cost of medical care" our monthly premium was going up to $605/month instead of $480. UGH!!! What the crap?!?!? Just like the phone company, the insurance company can basically do whatever it wants because they know they have us by the b***s.
So, this month we have had to pay $700 in extra medical bills, $125 more in health insurance, and we will have to pay an extra $185 on our phone bill in a couple of weeks. Oh, and did you catch the part about Todd being in REAL ESTATE?!?!?! We all know how that market is right now!! We are holding our own with the commissions he is getting and with me working part-time, but we certainly don't have a plethora of extra cash laying around. It just gripes me that companies can do whatever they want, and the consumers are just supposed to take it. Whatever happened to good customer service and treating people like human beings?????? Call me old fashioned, but I believe in living life by the Golden Rule: "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you." I guess our world has gotten too big for the Golden Rule. I think God would disagree, though.........
Thursday, July 10, 2008
A Good Laugh!!
OK, so this morning I got to work and checked my personal email. There was an email from Facebook stating that Kristian Kennedy had sent me a Piece of Flair (for those of you who are not familiar w/Facebook, a Piece of Flair is a "button" you can send someone that has a particular message on it). Then, there was an email from my friend Angel Kennedy (Angel and Kris are married), and the email was titled "Facebook Error, So Sorry, URGENT." Well, that sparked my curiosity, so I decided to read Angel's email before logging on to Facebook to see the Piece of Flair from Kris.
Angel's email proceeded to apologize profusely for accidentally sending her girlfriends a Breast Cancer Awareness Piece of Flair from her husband's Facebook account instead of from her own. Apparently, Angel had been on the computer in what she thought was her Facebook account, and she decided to send this Piece of Flair to her girlfriends. Well, little did Angel know that she was actually in KRIS'S account when she sent the Piece of Flair.
Now, you may not think it strange that a man would send some women a Breast Cancer Awareness POF. Afterall, this cause is important to many men as well as women. The HILARIOUS part about the POF was what it said. It had the BCA pink ribbon on it, and it said "Because your boobs are important to me"!!!!!!! When I read what the POF said, I just about fell out of my chair with laughter!! I mean, what are the chances that Angel would accidentally send that particular POF from her husband's Facebook account?!?!?! I am still laughing about this as I type, and for those of you who read this I hope it gives you a good chuckle for the day!
To Angel and Kris, no harm done! I appreciate the laugh because I needed it! I haven't had a good laugh like that in quite a while! I am sorry that the laughter is at your expense, but I can't help myself!! I am happy to know my boobs are important to you, and you can send me Pieces of Flair anytime you wish!!! :-)
Angel's email proceeded to apologize profusely for accidentally sending her girlfriends a Breast Cancer Awareness Piece of Flair from her husband's Facebook account instead of from her own. Apparently, Angel had been on the computer in what she thought was her Facebook account, and she decided to send this Piece of Flair to her girlfriends. Well, little did Angel know that she was actually in KRIS'S account when she sent the Piece of Flair.
Now, you may not think it strange that a man would send some women a Breast Cancer Awareness POF. Afterall, this cause is important to many men as well as women. The HILARIOUS part about the POF was what it said. It had the BCA pink ribbon on it, and it said "Because your boobs are important to me"!!!!!!! When I read what the POF said, I just about fell out of my chair with laughter!! I mean, what are the chances that Angel would accidentally send that particular POF from her husband's Facebook account?!?!?! I am still laughing about this as I type, and for those of you who read this I hope it gives you a good chuckle for the day!
To Angel and Kris, no harm done! I appreciate the laugh because I needed it! I haven't had a good laugh like that in quite a while! I am sorry that the laughter is at your expense, but I can't help myself!! I am happy to know my boobs are important to you, and you can send me Pieces of Flair anytime you wish!!! :-)
Tuesday, July 8, 2008
What Is My Purpose??
I have been thinking a lot lately about what my purpose in life is, my reason for existence, what makes me unique, what adds to the world in which I live. Since giving birth to my daughter, I have realized that part of my purpose is being a "Mom" and raising a happy, healthy child. I never gave much thought to having children until I was approaching my mid-30's. At that time, my thought was, "Well, if I am going to have kids, I guess I'd better get started since I'm not getting any younger!" Other than that, I didn't really think about being a mom as being part of my purpose in life. Boy, was I in for a surprise!
Now, commonsense told me that being a parent was going to be a HUGE responsibility. It was going to be my responsibility along with my husband to raise a child who was thoughtful, respectful, confident, a Christ-follower, etc. etc. As a fairly intelligent person I realized the significance of being a parent. What I didn't realize was how much it was going to mean to be "Mommy" to a child. From the moment that Sydney was born, I knew what true love and sacrifice was. I knew I was her mom, and no one, NO ONE could ever take that away from me. As she has grown daily, I have been reminded continually of the gift she is to me and that my love for her is greater than any other love I have ever known.
Recently, Sydney has begun saying "Momma" a lot (and "Dadda" too, of course!). Last night I had some friends over for dinner. Sydney and Todd had been out on a "date" together, and when they got home he brought her outside where my girlfriends and I were chatting after dinner. Sydney saw me, reached out to me, and said "Momma, Momma." It was at that moment that I really got the fact that I AM her "Momma." She and I share a special bond that she will share with no one else in life. For that, I am eternally grateful to God. I always want Sydney to know that above all, she is loved unconditionally by her father and me, and there is NOTHING that can take that love away! My greatest purpose in life is to raise her to love God with all her heart and learn His purpose for HER life.
When it comes to my purpose in life besides being a mom, that's where I struggle. There is a group of women from church that meets once a month for fellowship together. At this meeting, someone shares something from God's Word, or their testimony, or something that means a lot to them in their Christian walk. A couple of weeks ago the leader of the group asked me if I might like to share something from my own experience at one of these meetings. I told her I would have to think about it because I honestly couldn't think (and still can't!) of anything to share.
It's not that God hasn't worked in my life or that His Word is unimportant to me. It's just that I have always thought of my life as very "vanilla," very basic, not too deep. I was raised in a middle-class, Christian home, my parents are still married, I became a Christian as a small child, I attended a Christian college, most of my friends and co-workers are Christians, I married my high school sweetheart, and the list goes on. I haven't had any "lightning bolt" experiences in my life (I'm not necessarily wanting any, either!). I haven't been some wayward sinner who was snatched from the gates of Hell, although I do know I AM saved from Hell by the grace of God. I haven't been into alcohol or drugs, I haven't slept with dozens of men, I haven't had some great "conversion" experience that has turned my life around in a drastic way. So, I am left thinking, "What do I have to offer the ladies in this group at church? What do I have to share with them that will impact their lives in some meaningful way?" This has been weighing on my mind since my friend asked if I would be interested in sharing at one of the meetings. I am still thinking about it, and I honestly don't know if I will accept her offer to share or not.
This all leads me to think that there has to be more to my purpose in life than just being a mom. What does God have in store for me? How can He use me? I know the best way to discover this is through prayer and reading God's Word daily. I will admit that I struggle to find time to do these things. It is my greatest weakness as a Christian. I know that only by taking time to be still and quiet before God will I learn what He has in store for my life and how He wants to use me. I am open to what God wants my purpose to be, and I am excited to discover what that is!!!
Now, commonsense told me that being a parent was going to be a HUGE responsibility. It was going to be my responsibility along with my husband to raise a child who was thoughtful, respectful, confident, a Christ-follower, etc. etc. As a fairly intelligent person I realized the significance of being a parent. What I didn't realize was how much it was going to mean to be "Mommy" to a child. From the moment that Sydney was born, I knew what true love and sacrifice was. I knew I was her mom, and no one, NO ONE could ever take that away from me. As she has grown daily, I have been reminded continually of the gift she is to me and that my love for her is greater than any other love I have ever known.
Recently, Sydney has begun saying "Momma" a lot (and "Dadda" too, of course!). Last night I had some friends over for dinner. Sydney and Todd had been out on a "date" together, and when they got home he brought her outside where my girlfriends and I were chatting after dinner. Sydney saw me, reached out to me, and said "Momma, Momma." It was at that moment that I really got the fact that I AM her "Momma." She and I share a special bond that she will share with no one else in life. For that, I am eternally grateful to God. I always want Sydney to know that above all, she is loved unconditionally by her father and me, and there is NOTHING that can take that love away! My greatest purpose in life is to raise her to love God with all her heart and learn His purpose for HER life.
When it comes to my purpose in life besides being a mom, that's where I struggle. There is a group of women from church that meets once a month for fellowship together. At this meeting, someone shares something from God's Word, or their testimony, or something that means a lot to them in their Christian walk. A couple of weeks ago the leader of the group asked me if I might like to share something from my own experience at one of these meetings. I told her I would have to think about it because I honestly couldn't think (and still can't!) of anything to share.
It's not that God hasn't worked in my life or that His Word is unimportant to me. It's just that I have always thought of my life as very "vanilla," very basic, not too deep. I was raised in a middle-class, Christian home, my parents are still married, I became a Christian as a small child, I attended a Christian college, most of my friends and co-workers are Christians, I married my high school sweetheart, and the list goes on. I haven't had any "lightning bolt" experiences in my life (I'm not necessarily wanting any, either!). I haven't been some wayward sinner who was snatched from the gates of Hell, although I do know I AM saved from Hell by the grace of God. I haven't been into alcohol or drugs, I haven't slept with dozens of men, I haven't had some great "conversion" experience that has turned my life around in a drastic way. So, I am left thinking, "What do I have to offer the ladies in this group at church? What do I have to share with them that will impact their lives in some meaningful way?" This has been weighing on my mind since my friend asked if I would be interested in sharing at one of the meetings. I am still thinking about it, and I honestly don't know if I will accept her offer to share or not.
This all leads me to think that there has to be more to my purpose in life than just being a mom. What does God have in store for me? How can He use me? I know the best way to discover this is through prayer and reading God's Word daily. I will admit that I struggle to find time to do these things. It is my greatest weakness as a Christian. I know that only by taking time to be still and quiet before God will I learn what He has in store for my life and how He wants to use me. I am open to what God wants my purpose to be, and I am excited to discover what that is!!!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
